I Wonder...

Each new day that I look into the face of my precious baby boy, I wonder. Does the newness and uncertainty ever wear off? Will I ever feel confident in raising a son? I wonder, will he become the man of God I pray he will be? Will I be able to teach him to be that man of God? I wonder why God has chosen now to bless and entrust me with raising a son. If I have all of these questions and insecurities, I wonder what Mary must have wondered. I wonder if she questioned, "Why me? Who am I to carry such a sacred blessing?" I wonder how she felt knowing what her baby boy would endure. I wonder if she was scared.

The only thing I am counting on is that in each new day that the Lord brings, He will also bring insight into how I should raise my precious son. He will equip me with the tools I need at each milestone and season of life that comes our way. I trust that He will instill the confidence that I need in raising a son; as I have my in raising daughters. I am thankful that I did not have to enter into parenthood alone; because the Father has always been there to help me. In all of my fears and failures, He is there. And in my security and confidence, He is there. Am I the only mom with these questions, fears, and concerns that also cries out to the Lord for help and assurance with parenting? I wonder?